Indian habits

Since my time in India is coming to its end; three and half month to go, count down in progress. I somehow want to summarize my time over here in the land of holy cows and hot and humid climate. I start with ‘Indian habits I don’t want to use in Sweden’

- Burping after indulging your breakfast/lunch/dinner. The more you burp after a meal, the better food you had! The more sound it makes, the better food you had!
- Farting. Ending the burp with a fart that leaves a brown skid mark in the pants is a sign that the food was really tasty and spicy!
- Spitting in the corners of the staircase. If no elevator is provided in the building you’re visiting you have the full right to spit your excessive saliva in the nearest corner. Extra point if your mouth is full of chewed red pawn which leaves a big red stain on the wall which is impossible to remove.
- Peeing in crouching position. What the hell is this, women sits down and pee, men stand up and pee, that’s it, no further question your honour! If God wanted men to sit down and pee he would have given us a mangina.
- Pooping in public. Since 80% of the population doesn’t have access to a functional toilet I understand that you need to release the pressure once in a while but please move more than 1 meter from the road. Maybe the beach is not the best choice either…..
- Crouch scratching. It’s not the normal Al Bundy hand down the pants when watching TV at home; it’s more scratching outside the pants with the whole hand when you don’t think anyone is seeing it.
- Queuing. If you leave more than 20 centimeter to the person in front of you in a queue you’re officially not in the queue in India. This means that you have the full right to just squeeze in and get a head of that person.
- Personal space. There’s no such thing as personal space in India!
- Shaking the head. No matter what the answer is too your question, you get a head shake which is a combination of a western ‘yes’ and ‘no’ head shake. The head shake can both mean ‘Yes’, ‘No’, ‘Maybe’, ‘Shut up you white boy and just give me the money’ or ‘I will do it but it will take time’. The worst part about the head shakes; I find myself doing it on a regular basis……

Hepp, some spaghetti with Barilla Olive sauce and a glass of water, yummie!

Over and out!