Simultaneous capacity in India 2009 is too play 'Sweet Home Alabama (live version)' on 'Guitar Hero - World Tour' on Expert level and at the same time explain too Mani, the chef, what time I want the breakfast to be served and what kind of ingredients I want in my morning omelet!
Life is sometimes very though in India for an ex-pat like me......
Over and out!
Showing posts with label Misc. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Misc. Show all posts
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Monday, April 20, 2009
Getting old
Man, I'm sore today after both playing tennis and golf this weekend. Even though we didn't play tennis for more than 25 minutes; we all were totally exhausted. One reason could be that the temperature was slightly over 39C and humidity close to 100%; another reason could be that we drank two beers just before playing. I think it was the weather........
On Sunday we went to the driving range to hit some golf balls. I'm quite happy with the way I spread the balls all over the place but most of the were OK. The funny thing was that we had too use one kind of balls for the driver and one for the iron clubs. The balls we used with the driver was inexpensive balls in case we sliced or hooked them out of bounds. I used one expensive ball together with the driver by mistake and got the evil eye from the supervisor. On top of that I pegged the ball in the wrong kind of surface and then he got really pissed off. How I'm a supposed to now that there's different surface to be used with the driver? I was about too tell him "In Sweden we have the same surface.." but stopped my self before it came out of my mouth cause he will probably not understand anything at all; been there, done that so too say.
The best of all was their solution for how to collect the balls back again. Two teenage boys were walking on the range picking the balls manually in to a PVC-pipe. The only protection they had from the speeding golf balls was an old red umbrella that merely covered the back and head. If they were to closed we stopped shooting for a while but the Korean gentleman next too us just kept on shooting. Only in India my friends.
Over and Out!
Friday, March 27, 2009
I'm alive
I'm alive, just busy with ordinary life in Sweden. Back on track again on Monday when I'm back in Chennai.
Over and Out!
Over and Out!
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Camera
One of the best 'investments' I've done in my life, Nikon D90. An advanced camera when required but also a very comfortable and easy camera when you don't have the stamina too push and turn buttons too find the correct setting. Approximate cost is 11500 SEK including 18-105 lens, 16GB memory card and camera bag.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Attack on the Sri Lankan cricket team
Read more at the following link:
http://edition.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/asiapcf/03/03/pakistan.srilanka.attack/index.html?iref=nextin
Just last month the Indian cricket team refused to play against Pakistan at their homefield in Lahore. Today this happened, tragedy for the sport and the country of Pakistan.
http://edition.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/asiapcf/03/03/pakistan.srilanka.attack/index.html?iref=nextin
Just last month the Indian cricket team refused to play against Pakistan at their homefield in Lahore. Today this happened, tragedy for the sport and the country of Pakistan.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Updates.........
I've got some kind of food posioning again and been in bed for the two last days. Not the worst food posioning I've had during my time in India but enough to make my energy go away. Today I feel better and will hopefully be back on track tomorrow.
It was probably the sunday brunch at Fishermans Cove; some of the meat kind of looked suspiciously red but what the hell...........what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger and gives you diarrhoea
Over and out!
It was probably the sunday brunch at Fishermans Cove; some of the meat kind of looked suspiciously red but what the hell...........what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger and gives you diarrhoea
Over and out!
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Indian Michael Jackson
Don't you just wanna get dressed in a red jump suit and move your feet like you been on a three day acid trip when you see this video?
Monday, February 16, 2009
Indian habits
Since my time in India is coming to its end; three and half month to go, count down in progress. I somehow want to summarize my time over here in the land of holy cows and hot and humid climate. I start with ‘Indian habits I don’t want to use in Sweden’
- Burping after indulging your breakfast/lunch/dinner. The more you burp after a meal, the better food you had! The more sound it makes, the better food you had!
- Farting. Ending the burp with a fart that leaves a brown skid mark in the pants is a sign that the food was really tasty and spicy!
- Spitting in the corners of the staircase. If no elevator is provided in the building you’re visiting you have the full right to spit your excessive saliva in the nearest corner. Extra point if your mouth is full of chewed red pawn which leaves a big red stain on the wall which is impossible to remove.
- Peeing in crouching position. What the hell is this, women sits down and pee, men stand up and pee, that’s it, no further question your honour! If God wanted men to sit down and pee he would have given us a mangina.
- Pooping in public. Since 80% of the population doesn’t have access to a functional toilet I understand that you need to release the pressure once in a while but please move more than 1 meter from the road. Maybe the beach is not the best choice either…..
- Crouch scratching. It’s not the normal Al Bundy hand down the pants when watching TV at home; it’s more scratching outside the pants with the whole hand when you don’t think anyone is seeing it.
- Queuing. If you leave more than 20 centimeter to the person in front of you in a queue you’re officially not in the queue in India. This means that you have the full right to just squeeze in and get a head of that person.
- Personal space. There’s no such thing as personal space in India!
- Shaking the head. No matter what the answer is too your question, you get a head shake which is a combination of a western ‘yes’ and ‘no’ head shake. The head shake can both mean ‘Yes’, ‘No’, ‘Maybe’, ‘Shut up you white boy and just give me the money’ or ‘I will do it but it will take time’. The worst part about the head shakes; I find myself doing it on a regular basis……
Hepp, some spaghetti with Barilla Olive sauce and a glass of water, yummie!
Over and out!
- Burping after indulging your breakfast/lunch/dinner. The more you burp after a meal, the better food you had! The more sound it makes, the better food you had!
- Farting. Ending the burp with a fart that leaves a brown skid mark in the pants is a sign that the food was really tasty and spicy!
- Spitting in the corners of the staircase. If no elevator is provided in the building you’re visiting you have the full right to spit your excessive saliva in the nearest corner. Extra point if your mouth is full of chewed red pawn which leaves a big red stain on the wall which is impossible to remove.
- Peeing in crouching position. What the hell is this, women sits down and pee, men stand up and pee, that’s it, no further question your honour! If God wanted men to sit down and pee he would have given us a mangina.
- Pooping in public. Since 80% of the population doesn’t have access to a functional toilet I understand that you need to release the pressure once in a while but please move more than 1 meter from the road. Maybe the beach is not the best choice either…..
- Crouch scratching. It’s not the normal Al Bundy hand down the pants when watching TV at home; it’s more scratching outside the pants with the whole hand when you don’t think anyone is seeing it.
- Queuing. If you leave more than 20 centimeter to the person in front of you in a queue you’re officially not in the queue in India. This means that you have the full right to just squeeze in and get a head of that person.
- Personal space. There’s no such thing as personal space in India!
- Shaking the head. No matter what the answer is too your question, you get a head shake which is a combination of a western ‘yes’ and ‘no’ head shake. The head shake can both mean ‘Yes’, ‘No’, ‘Maybe’, ‘Shut up you white boy and just give me the money’ or ‘I will do it but it will take time’. The worst part about the head shakes; I find myself doing it on a regular basis……
Hepp, some spaghetti with Barilla Olive sauce and a glass of water, yummie!
Over and out!
Monday morning
The prodigy from the west coast in Sweden Mr. Basshunter. 'Basshunter - Now you're gone' now playing on Chennai 104.8, crank up the volume and rock this office!
UNTZ, UNTZ, UNTZ...........
Friday, February 13, 2009
Visitors
I had a couple of friends over for a drinking party last night.Time: 02:00 AM to 05:00 AM
Place: My left and right foot
Served beverages: AB blood
Lesson learned: Never sleep with your feet outside the bed sheet!
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Dinner discussion
Conversation with Mani (the guy who cooks food for me) reg. todays dinner.
- Today I don't want Indian food. I want french fries.
- Uhhh.......frunch fry?
- Yes, you now the potato sticks you made a couple of months ago?
- Yes, no.....hmmmm.....?
- You chopped them up in sticks and then you fried them; I also had some chicken nuggets.
- Aaaah, I remember, franch fry you mean!
- Correct, can you make that?
- No problem John!
10 minutes passes by. I'm in the bed reading a book.
- John, you want Masala spices on the potatoes?
- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Over and out!
- Today I don't want Indian food. I want french fries.
- Uhhh.......frunch fry?
- Yes, you now the potato sticks you made a couple of months ago?
- Yes, no.....hmmmm.....?
- You chopped them up in sticks and then you fried them; I also had some chicken nuggets.
- Aaaah, I remember, franch fry you mean!
- Correct, can you make that?
- No problem John!
10 minutes passes by. I'm in the bed reading a book.
- John, you want Masala spices on the potatoes?
- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Over and out!
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
News Article of the Week
Indian newspapers are one of a kind; in the sense that it's quite different from a Swedish newspaper. I have a subscription of two news paper which are delivered to the door each morning around 6:50 AM to 7:10 AM. I would say I'm extremely surprised that the newspapers are showing up in time when so much else is late, late and late in this country. Anyway, most of the articles are related to the following subjects:
- Infrastructure (why it's delayed, who delayed, etc etc)
- Death. How many died in traffic, how got robbed and stabbed to death, a 23 year old woman falls down in a hole in the bus and gets under the bus and dies!
- Politicians shaking hand, telling what great job they actually could have done if the opposite party wouldn't interfere in their job.
- Collywood movie stars partying in their 80's outfits at some new trendy expensive pub
But what did I find in yesterdays paper; an article about the third gender, the transvestits in Chennai. What is quite unknown to people outside India is that India has a lot of transgender people; which basically is men in saris. Anyway, they are mostly begging and selling sex to earn money but some smart corporation people has now found out that they CAN actually work! The world welcomes India to 2009, daaahhh!
One of the jobs they will do in future is to assemble spare parts for companies like Nokia, Motorola and Foxconn; the mobile phone industry. My first thought was; why aren't my dear friends at Sony Ericsson offering their help to the transgender people?
Tom, Daniel, Per, Peter, Mats, Fredrik. Maria! I have some people who wants internship at your office, when can they come?
Over and out.
You Know You're Indian When....
You Know You're Indian When....
1. Your dad is some sort of engineer or doctor.
2. You know what's going to happen in every Hindi movie before it happens
3. You're father and grandfathers have hair on their ears
4. Your relatives' houses smell like incense, mothballs or both
5. You buy corn oil by the gallon.
6. You arrive one or two hours late to a party and think it's normal.
7. You are standing next to the two largest suitcases at the Airport.
8. Your parents don't realize phone connections to foreign countries have improved in the last two decades, and still scream at the top of their lungs when making long distance calls.
9. There is a sale on any item, you buy 100 of them.
10. Your mother does everything for you if you are male.
11. You do all the housework and cooking if you are female.
12. Your relatives alone could populate a small city.
13. You went to a university as far away from home as possible.
14. You still came back home to live with your parents after you had finished.
15. Your best friend got married at the age of 16.
16. You use chilli sauce instead of tomato ketchup.
17. You say you hate Indian films but secretly watch them with your parents.
18. You order Indian food in your own language to impress the people you're with but the waiters don't understand you.
19. You secure your baggage with a rope.
20. You're walking out of customs with your trolley at the airport and you see all twenty-five members of your family who have come to pick you up.
21. You're parents would freak out if your sister wore a crop top baring her midriff...but wearing a sari is perfectly acceptable
22. Your parent are panicking if you aren't married when you turn 25
23. Your mother measures wealth in gold and diamonds
24. A horoscope must decide your wedding date
25. Your parents drink 6 cups of tea a day
26. You are sick and tired of answering questions about "the dot"
27. You could not explain your religion to someone if you tried
28. No one ever seems to call ahead of time to say they are coming over for a visit.
Hepp, lunch time; Chicken Spring Rolls with Garlic Sauce and Cut Fruits. Same as last three months, why change if something is good?
1. Your dad is some sort of engineer or doctor.
2. You know what's going to happen in every Hindi movie before it happens
3. You're father and grandfathers have hair on their ears
4. Your relatives' houses smell like incense, mothballs or both
5. You buy corn oil by the gallon.
6. You arrive one or two hours late to a party and think it's normal.
7. You are standing next to the two largest suitcases at the Airport.
8. Your parents don't realize phone connections to foreign countries have improved in the last two decades, and still scream at the top of their lungs when making long distance calls.
9. There is a sale on any item, you buy 100 of them.
10. Your mother does everything for you if you are male.
11. You do all the housework and cooking if you are female.
12. Your relatives alone could populate a small city.
13. You went to a university as far away from home as possible.
14. You still came back home to live with your parents after you had finished.
15. Your best friend got married at the age of 16.
16. You use chilli sauce instead of tomato ketchup.
17. You say you hate Indian films but secretly watch them with your parents.
18. You order Indian food in your own language to impress the people you're with but the waiters don't understand you.
19. You secure your baggage with a rope.
20. You're walking out of customs with your trolley at the airport and you see all twenty-five members of your family who have come to pick you up.
21. You're parents would freak out if your sister wore a crop top baring her midriff...but wearing a sari is perfectly acceptable
22. Your parent are panicking if you aren't married when you turn 25
23. Your mother measures wealth in gold and diamonds
24. A horoscope must decide your wedding date
25. Your parents drink 6 cups of tea a day
26. You are sick and tired of answering questions about "the dot"
27. You could not explain your religion to someone if you tried
28. No one ever seems to call ahead of time to say they are coming over for a visit.
Hepp, lunch time; Chicken Spring Rolls with Garlic Sauce and Cut Fruits. Same as last three months, why change if something is good?
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